Thank you to everyone who tuned into my live video! Join me for my next live video in the app.
Welcome back to the dust, Brave Souls.
It’s a new year. Time to reintroduce myself with a concept I call Field Marginalia.
I want to talk about that feeling of not being worthy. The biggest lie we tell young artists is: “You have to go out and live life to create.”
Coming into 2026, I realize that’s Cope. It’s Avoidance. I joined the military and sought novelty just to “earn” the right to be an artist.
The Anchor of Resentment
Love is a noble cage. We justify abandoning our dreams to be “responsible.” But it’s a false binary.
If you sacrifice your art for family without attending to your soul, the price is Resentment. It is an anchor. You might not drown today, but eventually, the ship sinks and you won’t understand why.
The Superman Thought Experiment
We ask, “How can you draw flight if you haven’t skydived?”
But did the creator of Superman skydive? No.
Art does not require experience. It requires Attention.
Attend to the Craft, Yourself, and the Mundane. My son teaches me this—stopping to watch ants while the world rushes by.
The Refusal
The “Go Out and Live” mindset is the Sea of Novelty. Drifting is easy until people rely on you; then it becomes terrifying.
So this 2026, I have a Refusal.
I refuse to drift. I choose Deep Work. I refuse to sacrifice my family to ambition, but I also refuse to ignore the howl in my chest. Only in deep work do you find the Skill Forge.
Notes from the Sandbox: Szaahel & The Weird
For those attending the live stream, we focused on megalithic structures.
Szaahel: A reshaped reality based on the desert aesthetic. Flat places evoke fear; high places evoke awe.
Fungi: I’m obsessed with fungi—immortal entities between plant and animal.
The Lesson: You don’t need to be a mycologist. Be attentive. Draw the weird shape because you like it.
The Bones Speak
I ended with a Divination Roll.
The result? Three Sixes. The highest roll possible.
The bones say this is going to be a fantastic year.
A Birthday Request
My birthday is coming up, Brave Souls. I have one ask:
Share the Load: Send this to a friend drowning on the Sea of Novelty.
Engage: Talk to me in the comments.
If you are still here? Thank you.
It’s your boy Howler.
